Wow, I can't believe that Abraham is already a week old! It has been a really beautiful week. I LOVE the newborn stage, their needs are so simple and they are so fresh from God. Even though our house has sometimes been chaos, this baby has brought with him a little bit of heaven and we've all been basking in it. It has been wonderful not to have any plans or expectations except to rest, eat, and nap. We've been living on a baby schedule and it has been SO nice to slow down. I am going to make it last as long as I possibly can!
He is really a mellow little kid. Either that or I am just a more mellow mother now than I used to be. It is probably a combination of both.
We didn't realize it when we named him but "Abraham" sounds very similar to "Apricot" (which was the name we called him in the womb) and we've all had a hard time transitioning over--especially Jon. I think half the time he calls the baby "Apricot" and the other half of the time he gets it right. For the first several days Rose didn't even try to call the baby by his name because she was so confused about what to call him. We had the same problem though with Asher too. His womb name was "Buster" and because it ended in an "er" just like "Asher" we got it confused really easily. It took us about a month before his name stuck, and I am thinking that it might be the same with Abraham.
I really love nursing a baby. It is beautiful to look down and see two big eyes looking back at me with love, trust, and perfect faith in my ability to provide. It makes me feel incredibly needed to know that my body is once again keeping this little boy alive and that we aren't quite separate yet. I think that one of my favorite authors, Louise Erdrich, explained it best:
"One day as I am holding baby and feeding her, I realize that this is exactly the state of mind and heart that so many writers from Thomas Mann to James Joyce describe with yearning-- the mystery of an epiphany, the sense of oceanic oneness, the great yes, the wholeness. There is also the sense of a self merged at least temporarily-- it is deathlike. I close my eyes and see Frost's too peaceful snowy woods, but realize that this is also the most alive place I know-- Blake's gratified desire. These are the dark places in the big two-hearted river, where Hemingway's Nick Adams won't cast his line, the easeful death of the self of Keat's nightingale. Perhaps we owe some of our most moving literature to men who didn't understand that they wanted to be women nursing babies." ("The Blue Jay's Dance", pg. 148)I think she might be onto something.
Asher and Rose have been so enthralled with their little brother. They constantly want to hold him, give him his pacifier, "pet" him (as they say), and help with him. For the first few days Asher was especially concerned about making sure the baby was getting enough to eat. In fact, one of the very first things he said when he was the baby for the first time was, "Oh, Mom give him milk. He's hungry." When I explained that I'd already fed him he went into his room and came back with a bowl full of plastic food from his play kitchen for the baby to eat. Then a few minutes later he went downstairs and came back up with a glassful of chocolate milk "for the baby". He ended up drinking it and went back downstairs. When I hadn't heard anything from him for several minutes I told Jon to go check on him and Jon found him making the baby some "juice" out of vanilla, curry powder, cinnamon and baking soda! In the last week he's made the baby several more "juices" and it is getting to the point where we might need to put a lock on the spice cupboard. He is just thrilled about being a big brother.
Rose is doing well adjusting, but I think she is having a hard time with the fact that she doesn't get quite as much attention as she used to. I think it is also hard for her that she is little and can't help with the baby as much as she wants to. She's been peeing her pants a lot the last few days (something she has hardly ever done) and I wonder if it isn't because she wants to get our attention. Our family dynamic has shifted and I think it is going to take us all awhile to adjust to it. Yet in the meantime, any suggestions about helping older siblings adjust to a new baby?
I didn't realize what a big difference two extra weeks in the womb makes in a baby's development and size! Abraham was almost two pounds smaller than Rose and Asher when he was born and he just feels so tiny to me! He has the skinniest little chicken legs.
I just can't get enough of him. I wish there was a way I could slow down time. I hate seeing these days pass by so quickly.
Have a wonderful weekend!
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