Thursday, April 28, 2011

Five Things for Friday, 7th Edition

Wow, it has really been a long time since I've done my 5 things for Friday! Sorry Friday just always sneaks up on me so fast!
-1-

I thought I had linked to this but I realized a few weeks ago that I completely forgot to. Way back in February I wrote a guest post for Mormon Women: Who We Are about how I've learned to balance blogging and the Internet community with my "real" life. The article is called "Things As They Really Are: Overcoming an Internet Addiction." Here is just a little taste to get you hooked so you'll go over and read the whole thing.
... It was that last statistic that really got to me. I realized that for the last several months my “emotional highlight” of the week had occurred on-line. I realized that I knew more about the lives of my blogging friends than I did the woman next door, the women I visit taught, or even my younger sister. My contributions to conversations at the dinner table almost always involved something I had read or seen online or something from someone’s life I read on a blog. I also realized that I was also starting to compare my life and my children to other women’s lives and children that I didn’t even know and whose pictures and lives had been Photo Shopped and edited. I was judging myself and my family by an illusionary standard and sometimes it just made me miserable. True, I was doing a lot of good for the women I associated with online but I was also neglecting the people around me who also needed me. By allowing myself to get sucked into the Internet I was, like Elder Bednar warned, disconnecting from my physical body and the physical world and gradually losing sight of things as they really were. Read the rest

-2-

As most of my long time readers know I am working on a book with a group of women called "The Gift of Giving Life: Re-discovering the Divine Nature of Pregnancy and Birth." We are getting excitingly close to having a rough draft of the book put together but we are still looking for women who are willing to share their spiritual insights into giving birth and becoming mothers. We have so many incredible stories but we are especially in need of the following types of stories.

Sexual abuse - How it affected your birth choices/experience OR how birth helped you heal from sexual abuse.

Abortion - What was pregnancy and birth like after an abortion, however long ago, for whatever reason.

Mental Illness - Mothers who suffer from mental illness.

Please remember that we are most interested in the spiritual angle of these stories. For example: How did you counsel with the Lord? How did healing occur? How has your relationship with God been strengthened? How did/do you see the hand of the Lord in this experience?

I know that these types of things are always hard to put into words but it is SO INCREDIBLY powerful for women to hear stories from women they can relate to. The stories can be anonymous and if you email them to ldsbirthstories@gmail.com or to thegiftofgivinglife@gmail.com they go to our book secretary and I won't even know who sent it in. We are also still accepting stories that fit into our other sections as well!

-3-

The modern dance group I am dancing with is holding a concert this Saturday night that I am performing in. If you live near by you are welcome to come! I am super excited but sort of terrified. It has been years since I've danced on stage. It will be such a good experience. Here are some of the pictures that were taken at our photo shoot last weekend. I think they turned out wonderful. The two of me on the chair are just poses I made up but the one in the middle is a shot from one of the dances I am in.





Wish me luck!

-4-

After my melt down at church a few weeks ago one of the women at church suggested that I try taking the Love and Logic parenting classes that are offered at a local elementary school. I just got done with the last class yesterday and I am now a new mother... really I am. I will admit that I have a temper and that I loose it way more often with my children than I would like. The class really focused on teaching you to NEVER discipline your children without doing it with love. That has been such a HUGE paradigm shift for me and it is really taking some re-training to stop the behaviors I am so used to doing. But I REALLY need to change because recently my little three-year-old has been copying all my bad behaviors and it is really distributing to see the worst of myself coming out in him. I've only been using the Love and Logic skills for about 2 weeks but already there is a huge difference in our house. I'd highly recommend checking out their books, audio series, DVDs or taking a class if there is one by you! (Oh, and I'm not getting paid to say this. I just really have loved what I've learned!).

-5-

So a few weeks ago I filled out an application and the first question it asked was "What do you spend a lot of time thinking about?" I thought it was such an interesting question. I answered the question by saying that I spend a lot of time thinking about women in the scriptures (which you'd expect from me right?), my doula work, the spiritual aspects of the process of creating human life, my husband, and my children. But it got me interested. What do YOU spend a lot of time thinking about? I'd really love to know.

8 comments:

  1. My husband and I just finished the L&L class a couple weeks ago, too! I'd read the book about 5 years ago and it helped soooo much, and we learned a few new things, too, this time around.

    ReplyDelete
  2. That's so fun that you're dancing again! you are so talented! Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love that you're doing the dance performance! It is so wonderful when you can do something to nourish yourself emotionally and physically like that.

    I have also heard of Love and Logic from a few places lately and know we have classes at the local library here, but I don't know how to take the classes when I have kids! :-p I don't want to have to get a babysitter every single week especially at bedtime. :-/ I've been losing my temper more than I'd like to admit the past several months, though it has been getting better recently. And I've also been seeing my negative sides coming out through Jefferson. Doh! So I'll have to check out the books and DVDs! I think that could totally help me too.

    As far as what I think about....I think a lot about homeschooling, how I'm parenting or could parent differently, nutrition, planning meals, and organizing our home. (And a lot of focus lately on buying a home now too!)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think a lot about my new baby, and politics. I have always thought a lot about politics, and with an election in just a few days I'm thinking about it more than usual.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I read one of the Love & Logic books and have to admit that I don't find some of the practices very inspiring. Especially because we are going to be foster parents - some of their "methods" are absolute no-nos when it comes to children who have been abused and neglected, and I feel that if it's not good enough for abused and neglected kids, then it's not good enough for my "normal" kids. However, I was originally intrigued because I think that you SHOULD parent with love and logic. I just don't agree with some of the examples that I was reading in their book.

    I much prefer books like "The Soft Spoken Parent" written by my old institute teacher (Dr. Wallace Goddard - who is a Marriage and Family guy). It has a similar message (parenting with LOVE and LOGIC) but also brings in a really spiritual aspect (The Soft Spoken Parent is the LDS version, and there is a "non-lds" version called "Soft Spoken Parenting") You can also read him/watch his YouTube videos at Drwally.org - highly recommended. Man, I get kind of gushy just thinking about the way I feel when I listen to/read his writings. I feel that way when I read some of your stuff, too! :)

    But I'm glad Love & Logic is helping your parenting. I think at least the principles are correct, if some of the methods are a little... off.

    I never knew you were a doula! That makes me love you ever more. :) My cousin is a doula, too. After two children with my husband (bless his heart) and attempting husband-coached childbirth, we've decided that a doula is probably better... my husband isn't exactly... well, he's just not exactly suited for that kind of thing :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I just wanted to thank you for this wonderful blog! I am teaching RS and your blog was the inspiration behind my topic. Is it ok if I use information from your blog for my lesson? I will be sure to give you credit!
    Thanks for being such an awesome example!
    Erin

    ReplyDelete
  8. Heather--you truly are such an example! I'm always shocked with the new things I'm learning about you! modern dancing? Way cool--those pics are neat too. Thanks for sharing the Love and Logic. I have had some major problems with that myself. And Abby is taking my bad habits as well. It's so sad. It doesn't help that my hubby is an instructor in the military--they're so demanding and rough mannered that sometimes he forgets we're not his students but his family. I have to put him in his own time out during those moments (don't worry...he's not like the true military mean...he just expects the girls to do what he says the first time--totally not acceptable for these little kiddoes we have!) Anyway, I love ya and I wish I lived near you to be motivated more by you. OH and the things I think about...I think about all the things I've got to do...chores, projects, changes in myself...and how to do them.

    ReplyDelete